One Night Stands

In our modern dating society, the term ‘one-night stand’ is used loosely. Millions of people are getting together for a one-time romp in the sack. I don’t know about you, but I’m a little confused as to what a one-night stand really is.

In my opinion, one-night stands occur when people meet for the first time, experience an instant sexual attraction, and in a few hours (or maybe at the end of the night) are having sex. After it’s done, they say ‘sayonara’ and never see or hear of each other again.

But when I talk to men and women and tell them I have never had a one-night stand, no one believes me. And usually, men and women have different takes on what a one-night stand really is.

One guy told me that a one-night stand is a fling. He said that a one-night stand occurs when you meet someone, have sex with them for a short period of time (in his case a few weeks), and then you split up and never talk to each other again. I told him that’s no one-night stand, because he talked to her after the fact and continued having sex with her for the next couple of weeks. In my book, that’s a full-out fling. A one-night stand is a one-time deal.

Let’s get it straight, a one-night stand is exactly what it states: one-night of sex with a relative stranger, and the next day you go your separate ways. Let’s not get it confused with a fling, where you have sex with someone repeatedly, even if you then cut it off and never see each other ever again.

The majority of single men and women I know have had at least one one-night stand in their lives. I do find this is more common with men than women. However, more women have likely had one-night stands than care to admit it. Meanwhile, men are often known to brag about their one-night affairs. Regardless, here are some tips and warnings about one-night stands.
Don’t Forget the Condoms
Bottom line: If you’re going to have a one-night stand, make sure you have condoms on hand, because you probably don’t want a cold shower to replace a night of drunken sex.

Check your one-night stand list
We all have our standards; in dating, the clothes we wear, and even with the food we eat.
So why not have standards when it comes to one-night stands? It’s wise to choose someone whose name you will have a hard time remembering, have nothing in common with, and who has the cash for their own cab fare.

Don’t give out your phone number
Imagine having sex with someone you barely even know, then asking for their number so you can “keep in touch”. Kind of late to be getting to know each other, don’t you think? Sure, we all want to be polite after a one-night stand, but let’s face it, it’s only out of courtesy. So forget it. Save the courtesy for your acquaintances and just leave without a phone number; your one-night stand has been accomplished.

Do Bad Guys Get the Girl ?

If we are to believe the movies, the ruthless tough guy, Mr. Bad Boy, always gets the girl !! If we remember the bad guys at school and college with the best looking babes it appears that the movies could be right. The best looking girls always seem to love the bad guys. Maybe because the best looking guys always became the bad guys ? Everywhere we tend to see bad guys and nice girls, we see fools and meatheads with the girls of our fantasies. In the mall we see our flaxen haired goddesses with America's Most Wanted. Is it nature at work, is it us, what is going wrong? You see men are confused. Men like to refer to stereo types and work from them. We are told that we need to be a hero and a tough guy, but then we are told we need to be in touch with our sensitive sides and be a modern man holding the baby.

Meanwhile the man down the street who treats his girlfriends mean, never calls, is rude and unhelpful and shows little respect appears to have a fan club developing. Life my friends is often unfair. Okay let us look at what is going on with this scenario.

Interest. Yes, interest. Bad guys are interesting, they do interesting things. They have strayed from the straight-and-narrow and are a law unto themselves. They do what they want. They go where they will and they answer to no one. They are interesting. Tow the line, do as you are told and you are dull. Mavericks are interesting, straight guys are not. Generally.

Bad Guys are a challenge, we all love a challenge. Women love a challenge just like guys. If something is a challenge the end results must surely be worthwhile? Of course and bad guys are a challenge. The girls who go after a bad guy want to keep them to themselves and will do a great deal to keep hold. The more you want them, the greater there is a chance they may walk away. Women love to feel good about themselves and getting their bad guy, at least for a while, satisfies that urge. This appeals to some people and the greater the danger of loosing a bad guy, the greater the effort to keep them. There may be a lesson there.

Bad guys are confident and self assured. They know what they are about and don' really care what others think. They are their own men and don't need others to prop them up. Some can become almost caricatures of themselves but that doesn't make them any less attractive. Bad guys don't have to be in shape, just look at James Galdofini from The Sopranos. Somewhat out of shape if Mr. Soprano doesn't mind me saying, but immensely attractive all the same.

What have we got if we combine these facets. Power, strength of character, confidence, a maverick nature and an immensely interesting personality. That equals sexy. Is it any wonder therefore that such types of guys often get the gals. It doesn't mean to say that we like them and it doesn't mean to say that this is fair or a good thing. But it can be natures way.

I am not in any way suggesting that we should all be Mr. Bad Guy. No not at all. What I am saying is that there are lessons to be learned here. What is attractive can be modified and added to our social arsenal of dating weaponry. It is first the way you perceive yourself that matters. If you can increase your confidence levels, get your career on the right tracks, excel in what you do and be your own man within the confines of your working life then this will boost your attractiveness. You don't need to go round being bad, but you can be a bit more deliberate in your actions, a little less available and a little more enigmatic. This will boost your interest factor and again help in your attractiveness.

The modern dating game is highly complex and courting rituals can be a minefield. Go back to basics and analyze within yourself what is it that you think partners like and how can you match of yourself to those qualities. Changing just a few small things could make the world of difference.

Kinky Things She Loves (But Won't Tell You)

Him: Nothing?
Her: No. Nothing.
Him: How come? I touched it like you told me to.
Her: Well, what if you, um, bit it a little?
Him: You mean like this…?
Her: Ouch! Cut it out! Let’s just forget about it.

Hit a sexual slump? Don’t worry, it happens. It doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you, per se; it just means that you probably need to work on spicing things up in the bedroom (or in the kitchen, or on the floor, or in the shower, or against the wall, or in the car, or in an elevator, or in the stairwell).
Most women need more than a “wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am” approach to sex. They need excitement, passion, heat, and… kink? Some women, however, may be unsure how to approach the subject, simply because “nice” girls aren’t supposed to like whips and chains. But you’d be surprised how many of them do!
Next time the two of you are lying in bed and you’re contemplating whether or not to fake a headache, try asking her if she might like “something different.” Here are seven kinky things your gal might be fantasizing about, but is probably too shy to tell you.
1- Stroke It
Masturbation is a healthy part of life, so why not share it with your partner? If you’re not too shy, put your guard down and let her watch as you get acquainted with yourself. The whole voyeurism element has a certain mystique that might appeal to her. The big perk for you is that after she watches you please yourself, she might get a few new ideas or tips on how she can improve the way she pleases you.
2- Fender Bender
Anal sex is a century-old position, but it tends to have a negative stigma attached to it. This might be why some couples have yet to venture into this unknown territory, and why some women might be a little shy when it comes to suggesting it. You can start slowly by spooning -- the position in which you both lie on your sides, so that her back is facing you. This is a very slow and intimate way of initiating anal sex. Once you’ve mastered this, you can graduate to full-fledged, passionate anal sex (you know, the kind you see in movies).
3- Tough Love
Is she a control freak? Then maybe she’d like to try a little S&M. This is the practice by which you become submissive and let her boss you around with a few props, such as whips and handcuffs. It might get a little painful at times, so before the hot-wax and nipple-pinching ritual begins, make sure you’ve established a code word, like “zebra” or “mac and cheese,” so she knows when to stop the torture (I mean, the titillating, sensual love-making). You may be wondering, “What’s in it for me?” Well, you get to help her live out a lifelong fantasy, and you make her feel happy and secure in your relationship in the process. Plus, you get to see her in a hot leather outfit.
4- Gadgets and Gizmos
Sex toys are a fun and exciting way to put some heat back in the bedroom. You can take baby steps and begin with heated and flavored massage oils, then try applying some orgasm-enhancing lubricant to her genitalia, and finally, you can use a vibrator on her.
Once you’re both feeling a little more adventurous, you can tackle the world of dildos and anal probes and beads. Use them on her, let her use them on you, take turns, or find a way to use them on each other at the same time. Regardless of how you do it, this bit of kink is sure to kick-start a heated sexual frenzy.
5- Curtain Call
If you dabbled in theater in high school, you now have the chance to star in your own show. Role-playing might be on her “Must Try” list of kinky fantasies. Map out interesting scenarios or pick real-life sexy couples to model yourselves after, then grab some fun costumes and let your imaginations guide you.
You might feel a little silly at first, but after a few “rehearsals,” you’ll probably start to like it. Some characters, like her French maid or your sultry Latin cabana boy, might start to make regular appearances in the bedroom. You might also like to tape this little production; you can watch it together afterward over some popcorn.
6- Shall We Dance?
It’s no secret that most guys would love to see their significant other do a private sexy dance for them. Some couples even go as far as to have poles installed in their bedrooms. But have you ever thought about how you would fare dancing with that pole? I bet she has.
Why not surprise her with a sexy little dance of your own? Throw on one of her favorite songs, and just go for it! Feel free to do a little practice dance in front of the mirror when you’re alone. And don’t worry about making a fool of yourself -- she’s likely to be so touched that you went through the trouble that she won’t even notice your two left feet.
7- Three’s A Crowd
For the more adventurous, thrill-seeking woman, adding someone new into the mix might be interesting. That’s right -- having a threesome isn’t only your fantasy. Some women have also entertained the idea. For those of you who are deterred by the idea of sharing your woman with another man, or just by the idea of being in bed with another man, don’t worry because another female fantasy that might come into play here is her desire to be with another woman.
Something important to note -- before you start running a list of her friends through your head as possible candidates -- is that threesomes might be dangerous for a relationship. So, make sure you discuss it thoroughly beforehand and you both understand what the boundaries and limits of this romp are.

Source: Askmen.com